Strengthen Her Hand in God: Encouraging the Moms Coming Up Behind You

My husband and I spent over twenty years living on a Christian college campus. While he was the Dean of Students and a professor, I was homeschooling and raising our children. One of the best things about living on campus was being able to have college and seminary students in our home daily. They were at our table for meals, in our living room for family Bible time, and in our kitchen for late-night discussions and homemade brownies. They were a part of our daily rhythm, and we loved it! 

As my children entered their teen years, I began working in a toddler Sunday school class, hoping to connect with young moms by building relationships with their children. At the same time, our pastor’s wife started a mentoring ministry and asked me if I’d be a part of it. Monthly, we and a couple of other older moms would circle around young moms, sip tea or coffee and eat some yummy treats, talk through specific topics that interested them, and end with sharing and prayer.   

One morning, I walked into this room of young moms and found my seat. Looking around, I observed tired faces who had come carrying burdens, with questions that needed to be answered and practical needs that needed to be shared. I had been so excited for the opportunity to be involved in this sweet group of young moms, but it suddenly struck me that there was no way I could meet the needs of all these women. I had teenagers who needed me and who I was still homeschooling. I had a home to take care of and ministry that was happening on campus. I suddenly felt completely overwhelmed and wondered if I had what it takes to come alongside moms who were a few steps behind me. 

I went home that day and began digging deeper, trying to intentionally discover exactly what my responsibility was now that I had entered the “older woman” season of life. I read Scripture and prayed that God would show me how to live out this important calling of being available to the younger generation of moms.[1] This happened several years ago, but he used that little mom group in so many ways. Not only in the lives of the young moms who attended but in my life as well. Here are some lessons I learned about investing in the lives of those a few steps behind: 

Point them to true hope. 

In 1 Samuel 23, David was hiding because King Saul wanted to kill him. His dear friend, Jonathan, came to encourage him. Verse 16 says, “And Jonathan, Saul's son, rose and went to David at Horesh, and strengthened his hand in God.” When Jonathan left that time together, he had focused David on God—he was not needed anymore because he had directed David's attention to his ultimate source of strength. David had all he needed.

The day that I became overwhelmed in the mom group, I was believing the lie that I was their hope—that I somehow needed to meet all the needs of those precious young moms. But that was not—and is not—my calling! God allowed our paths to cross so that I could strengthen their hand in God. I am not equipped to solve their every problem, and I am unable to be there every time they need encouragement. But if I point them to God in our time together, I can leave them with everything they need. He is the only One in whom our hope should lie. 

Be intentional. 

Strengthening others’ hands in God—for his glory—takes intentionality and discipline. Every day, we can pray and ask God who he wants us to connect with for the purpose of pointing them to him. This might be accomplished by including younger moms in our daily rhythms. We can simply text and check in or have them and their children over for lunch. We can babysit so they can grocery shop, we can drop off food, or we can meet them at a coffee shop and offer to hold their baby while they enjoy their cup of coffee. As we live life together like this, we can prayerfully be intentional in our conversation, asking about their challenges and victories and ways we can pray for them and their family. 

It's okay to not always be available.

One of the most important things I learned from my dear friend and pastor’s wife was how to prioritize my time and to have the freedom to say, “I’m not available today.” I longed to spend more time with her because I learned much when we were together. However, there were days when she was busy with other priorities. She was a wife, mom, and grandmother. She was not able to spend as much time with me as I would have liked, but she set an example of faithfulness within her limits. I, too, have times when I will not be available to others or I have to pick and choose between good opportunities. God used my pastor’s wife to show me that my strength is only found in him, and he is always there for me, 24/7. God can work similarly in other young moms’ hearts, even when we have to say “no.”

Tell them that God is faithful.

One of my favorite joys in being a part of the “older generation” now is coming alongside younger believers to share with them the faithfulness of God in my life and to remind them of the promises of God.[2] Having been through many of their struggles, I’m able to offer a bigger-picture perspective, encouraging them with stories of God’s provision and growth over the long haul.

We strengthen young moms’ hands in God when we remind them about the principles and promises of God that are especially applicable to their circumstances. We help them persevere in their calling as a mom, and in their walk with God, by speaking truth and answering the call to invest in their life. When we immerse our minds in the Word of God and meditate on it day and night,[3] we become a fountain of living water,[4] ready to be poured out[5] on those who are in the seasons behind us. This is our calling and privilege! 

[1] Titus 2:3-4 

[2] Psalm 145:4

[3] Joshua 1:8

[4] John 7:37-39 

[5] Philippians 2:17