3 Ways to Resist Overwhelm and Prioritize Jesus This Christmas

It’s mid-November and Christmas is just around the corner. Are you ready? 

If you’re anything like me, this question might induce a strange mix of emotions: something between wonder and worry, warm fuzzies and total panic. On one hand, we love the festivity and intentionality of the Advent season. But on the other hand, the holidays always seem to come with oversized expectations and a pressure to “do it all.”  

As a mom, you’re probably already dreaming of a holiday season jam-packed with fun experiences and family traditions. You might feel it’s your job to create special memories, curate cozy spaces, and cook up delicious meals. Perhaps you’ve started making lists: Christmas cards to send, gifts to buy, decorations to put up around the house. Soon enough, your calendar will fill up with parties to host and attend, school events to volunteer for, and end-of-year gatherings. As a Christian, you might also be considering how to guide yourself and your family into a meaningful, Jesus-focused Advent. You may feel pressure to find the perfect devotional or count-down calendar, scouring social media to find recommended resources, tempted to purchase and implement them all. 

While our hearts are usually in the right place, we have to admit: it’s all a bit too much at times, isn’t it? Too often, we fall far short of our expectations. Our merry preparations can morph into overwhelm. Our fun traditions and even our family devotional time can start to feel burdensome—just another task on the lengthy holiday to-do list. By the end of December, we limp exhausted over the finish line and into the New Year—just grateful it’s finally over. In the hustle and bustle, we may even miss Jesus altogether. 

If this sounds familiar, now might be the perfect time to step back and reassess. Before we get swept up into the coming holiday season, let’s take inventory. Pray. Ask the Lord to give us wisdom through his Word. And consider making adjustments using three “Rs”: remember, re-prioritize, and remove.

Remember the Main Point. 

“Advent is designed to be a season of preparation and anticipation, the stoking of an ever-growing expectation for Christ’s arrival—both his first and his second.”[1] Some have called Advent a “Little Lent”—a period in the church calendar set aside for longing, repentance, and acknowledging our need for a Savior. As Lent prepares us to receive the good news of Easter, Advent prepares us to receive the good news of Christmas with greater joy. We acknowledge the darkness within and around us in order to stir up a greater anticipation for Jesus, the Light of the World.

And so—though our culture might tell us otherwise—the main point of the holiday season is not buying gifts, decorating our Christmas tree, throwing parties, or even doing fun things with our kids. In fact, the consumerism and hurry surrounding Christmas can often desensitize and distract us, making us forget the reality of our need for Jesus and our ache for his coming kingdom. As Christians, we can intentionally resist this tendency. During Advent, our primary focus should be anticipating Jesus’s arrival. Like watchmen on the walls, we are waiting eagerly for the King to appear, for the morning sun to rise.[2]

With this in mind, we can filter our holiday traditions and activities through these simple questions: Does this stimulate or dampen my family’s excitement for Jesus to come? Will this  distract me from the main thing or bring it more into focus?  

Re-prioritize the Essentials. 

Years ago, my Bible study leader Leslie gave an impactful illustration. First, she held up a large glass jar. Then, she held up a container of sand and another filled with large rocks. According to Leslie, the rocks and sand represented all the things we might do during the holiday season, and the jar represented our limited capacity and time. Interestingly, when Leslie poured the sand into the jar first, the large rocks would not fit. But, when she put the rocks in first and then the sand, everything fit! As our Bible study group entered a busy holiday season, Leslie wanted to show us the importance of prioritizing the essentials over the extras.

One of our biggest “rocks” during the holiday season—and in every season!—is to spend time with the Lord through prayer, his Word, and participating in worship at our local church. Another essential “rock” this December might be to intentionally help our family prepare for the coming of Jesus, finding specific ways to stir up their excitement for his arrival. Beyond these two essentials, we can ask the Lord to help us discern what is more like a rock and what is more like sand. Then, we can make every effort to prioritize the essentials over the extras. 

Consider making a list of all the activities, traditions and tasks you take on during the holidays. Prayerfully ask: Which of these items are more like the large rocks in the illustration? Which are more like sand? Which tasks are duties I should not neglect, and which are self-imposed or cultural pressures?

Remove the Extras. 

As we evaluate, we may realize some of our holiday traditions have a negative impact on our “waiting and watching.” But most will fall into more neutral territory. This should go without saying, but hanging lights on our house, throwing a Christmas party, and baking gingerbread cookies are not bad things! In fact, activities like these can be sources of great joy for our family. However, as the rock and sand illustration shows us, too many “good things” can also quickly crowd out the main thing. 

Even too many Christian resources can be a distraction. Although we may feel the need to implement a craft, a devotional, a memory verse, a Christmas carol, and an Advent calendar daily, it is likely better for our family to simplify. Consider engaging deeply with just one or two resources, instead of trying to do them all. Or, make things even more simple: just open the Bible together, talk, and pray. 

Ask: What “good things” could our family remove in order to create more margin for the main thing? What “extras” could we remove in order to better prioritize the essentials?

Over the last few years, I have found immense freedom during Advent by remembering the main point, re-prioritizing the essentials, and removing the extras. The gospel of Jesus takes the pressure off, reminding me that I am beloved in Christ whether I make a perfect holiday meal for our family or—more likely!—burn the Christmas cookies to a crisp. Because of Jesus, I am invited to enter December with more joy than panic and to tackle lengthy holiday to-do lists in worshipful response to what he has already done rather than trying to meet every expectation or “do it all.” I can filter out the “extras” without the dreaded “mom guilt,” leaving margin for what we truly enjoy and for Advent’s essential objective: to awaken our anticipation for Jesus to come. 

His arrival is just around the corner! Are you ready?

[1] Caroline Cobb, Advent for Exiles, p. 4

[2] Psalm 130:6; Isaiah 62:6-7