BONUS: Where Were We When… Transcript
This transcript has been edited for clarity.
Emily: Well, Laura, we have a lot of reflection ahead of us as the sunset starts to near the horizon for Risen Motherhood, but I know before we went to that series—because it's going to have a lot of feelings—we wanted to pop in with a bonus episode and share a little bit of our hearts for motherhood and just all of the things that we've written and thought about over the years. I feel like we've applied the gospel to so many different specific situations, not only on the show but also in our own lives.
Laura: Yes, absolutely. I'm excited because I think, today, we're going to play a little game of “where were we when” for—as, like you said—all these things that we've written. It's interesting because, I don't know about you, but I can picture for most things—not everything, but most things that are out there that we've written—I know where I was. I know how many kids I had at the time. I know some of the main struggles or hardships. I can picture myself on the couch or things like that. What about you?
Emily: Oh, yes. It's funny because I have a very foggy memory, so—
Laura: [Laughter] —I know. Same.
Emily: —I will do my best to recall, but I definitely can muster up the feeling that I had at the time and the struggles I remember facing when I wrote something, even if I can't remember exactly where I was seated in that moment.
Laura: I think I can actually remember that. I'm not even kidding.
Emily: That's impressive.
Laura: I'm like, "Oh, I was at a coffee shop." "Oh, I was literally on the floor."
Emily: That's impressive.
Laura: I don't know why words have that weird memory for me, or songs are that same way too. Like Em said, we're nearing the end of Risen Motherhood, so it has us all reflective. We're just excited to share with you guys some of these writings because they come out of our new book that comes out on March 4, 2025—we're in a new year here. It's called A Million Tiny Moments.
Emily: Let's get the subtitle. If you ever saw this on Laura's Instagram, I really struggle to read book titles. [Laughter]
I'm going to read it from the book right now. It's A Million Tiny Moments: Reflections to Refresh a Mom's Spirit. This is really different from the other books that we've co-written that have been more like—we want to show you how to apply the gospel; we want to teach you how to learn the gospel and how to think about your life through that lens. This is much more poetic. These are a lot of the writings that we did over the years for Instagram and for the website and that we've done for different downloads.
Laura: Websites, other websites.
Emily: Things like that. We sat down one day and just laid them all out. We had over 150 pieces of writing and just started to categorize them and curate them. Then, of course, when we got them into an actual document that we were working from, we edited them, refreshed them, and organized them so that they made sense for different felt needs and struggles that a mom is facing. We're really excited to share this. I think the word “reflections” is really accurate because these pieces of writing are not something that's like, "Okay, you're going to walk away with like these three—"
Laura: —Tangible next steps.
Emily: “—things.” I think a mom will walk away—I hope a mom will walk away from each of these readings just really, truly feeling seen where she's at and encouraged about—even if it's not like this solved all your problems—but encouraged to keep pressing into the Lord wherever she's at.
Laura: Like Emily said, this book is a totally different vibe. When you guys see the cover—I know we've already shared it on social media, and so we'll make sure to link it in our show notes. When the cover—you'll even see that it's this modern, light vibe that we chose to go with. A lot of white space—a lot of breathing room—because, like the subtitle says, it's meant to refresh a mom's spirit. We wanted to leave that white space to be breathing room within the book even, as you guys engage in this stuff.
Emily: Sometimes you can't read this monster chapter. Sometimes you just need a little thing you can read in about five to seven minutes, and that's what this is.
Laura: Exactly.
Emily: Maybe less than that.
Laura: Less than that, I think. Yes. What we want to do today is—we really want to take a couple minutes to refresh your spirit. In light of the book and the subtitle Reflections to Refresh a Mom's Spirit, we really want to take a second to just encourage you. Maybe you're in a spot where you feel like nothing that you're doing matters, and you just can't seem to find purpose in your day. Maybe you're in a spot where you're not sure if God still sees you or if he is paying any attention to you or if he's in your home—if your home is a place where you can worship God. Maybe you're in a spot where you're just not sure if God is working in your situation.
We're going to take a sec and read you a couple of these entries and talk a little bit about the heart behind them and why we wrote them. If you end up enjoying these entries, remember that they're in our new book, A Million Tiny Moments. It comes out on March 4, 2025, and you can pre-order it anywhere books are sold. Let's get to the entries, Emily, and let's talk about where we were when.
Emily: All right, Laura, let's jump into the first one. I'm seeing that this one is titled “For When God Doesn't Feel Present.”
Laura: Yes, let's go.
When God Doesn't Feel Present
Sometimes, in the chaos of children and cooking and cleaning and errands and just generally managing a household and family, I forget why I'm doing what I'm doing. I forget who I serve. I get so focused on the here and now, I forget God and eternity. Last night, as I was cooking dinner, my husband was working late, and the kids were whining at my feet, I felt exasperated. Strung out. Overwhelmed.
And then, in the middle of it all, I stopped and sang a worship song to the Lord. Asking him to remind me of his presence.
Our homes are holy. They are places set apart for God and his work. God is not afraid of your crumb-filled kitchen floors or dirt-streaked walls. You don't have to be sitting in a church pew with a steeple overhead to worship him.
God meets you exactly where you're at. He is the God of thrown-together dinners, traffic in the carpool lane, and Magna-Tiles strewn on the living room floor. He is the God of water tables and playgrounds, drives home from work, and doctor’s appointments. God is everywhere! He is in everything! He needs nothing!
Remember that God's presence is in your home, Mom. Remember him at your family dinner, your playdates, your bedtimes, and in the middle of toddler tantrums. In the midst of chaos in your house, slow down and see his glory. Be overcome by his presence. You have been equipped for this by the power of the Holy Spirit. God is the reason why we do what we do.
Stay focused on what matters.
Emily: Hmm. That's good. That has a lot of really specific examples in it. I can almost imagine where you were at. Where were you?
Laura: This is one that I specifically remember. I was living in the suburbs of Chicago. I had three kids under four. My daughter was recently diagnosed with disabilities, and honestly, I was really struggling in that season. I remember Risen Motherhood was in full swing, and it was growing really rapidly. We were doing a lot of writing at the time. We were not only producing work for the website. At the time, I don't think we had any writers for us. It was just you and I keeping it going. We were also under contract for a book.
There was a lot of time spent writing, and we were content machines at the time. I think, as I wrote this, I remember feeling really lonely. Like I mentioned, my daughter was going through a diagnosis for disabilities. My husband had broken his leg. If you listen to old episodes of R|M, you will catch bits of this here and there. I was really scared. I don't know if I would have said that at the time, but I was scared about my future. I felt a lot of grief. It was about this moment that I was washing dishes, and I sang this song through tears, and it's that “Holy Spirit, you are welcome here. Come flood this place and fill the atmosphere. Your glory, God, is what our hearts long for—to be overcome by your presence, Lord.”
That song just came to mind in that moment. While we don't have to welcome the Holy Spirit anywhere—he's always within us—there's something really beautiful about just maintaining a posture that says, "Holy Spirit, I want you to work in this moment." That was something that I think I was trying to reflect in this moment—that I don't have to go to a church to do that, or I don't have to have this big, beautiful moment on a mountaintop, but instead, within my own home, every moment can be holy. God is meeting me and carrying me through everything.
Okay, Em, let's do another. This time, it's your turn.
Emily: This one is titled, “For When You Don't Feel Like Your Efforts Matter.”
In truth, it doesn't feel like our little efforts to share Christ with our children really add up. Reading the Bible here or there, praying inconsistently before meals, pointing out the beauty of God in everyday moments—these seem like small, feeble attempts at passing along our faith, but each effort matters.
Not because we are awesome or have lovely words, but because faith comes by hearing the Word of God and the gospel.
Because the Word of God is living and active.
Because the Word goes out and does the work—all we have to do is be faithful to carry the message.
No matter how weary you are today, remember to carry the message of grace to your children.
Carry it to the crib.
Carry it to the playground.
Carry it to the minivan.
Carry it to the dinner table.
Carry it to the bedside.
Carry it with confidence in God's ability to do big things with your small, everyday investments.
Laura: I love this one. This one has gone viral on social media several times, I'm fairly certain. Tell us a little bit about where you were when you wrote it.
Emily: I always get this one confused with—there's another one we have that I don't know if it was originally part of the same writing.
Laura: Has it also gone viral several times? [Laughter]
Emily: About—if you share the gospel with your kids one time a week by the age—or some portion of the gospel. If you talked to them about God one time a week, by the age of five, they will have heard it 260 times.
Laura: So cool.
Emily: It's this interesting thing of—we tell our kids “no” a dozen times a day and talk to them about all kinds of things. Why don't we talk to them about Jesus? I don't remember exactly where I was sitting when I wrote this, but I know that I had lots of young children. They were probably—
Laura: She can't even count them all.
Emily: I can't even remember them. I can't count them all. It was under the age of five. I just remember when I look back on those years, I see so many little things that we did that, in the moment, felt insignificant or felt like they weren't making an impact. I can remember driving around in the van, and we would play these catechism songs through the CD player. Remember CD players, Moms? We would listen to Scripture songs. I remember I would go on walks, and I would have a little prayer card, and I would pray out loud, or I would sit with my Bible study open and the kids would come and sit next to me—and I still have colored pages in my Bible.
One of them tore out one of the pages, and I have it taped in there. There were all these little interactions we had, whether it was reading a little book about faith or it was some really simple, short moments of talking to them about God. I just remember thinking at the time, "Is this even getting through to them? They just want to go play in the mud, or they're wondering when we're going to get to our destination." It is amazing to me now because our oldest ones are eleven and twelve—how much now I can really feel like this made a huge impact on them. A huge impact.
Even they can remember a lot of the things that we listened to. They can remember a lot of the things that I said—and even just shaping their worldview. I'm amazed that moms are able to participate in the neurological formation of children. All of those little connections are happening in their brain, and the Word of God is powerful. I think it's such motivation—and it's motivation to me now, even now that my kids are older—to keep making those little inputs because they are adding up, even if it feels like they're not.
All right, Laura, let's hear the next one.
Laura: This one's going to be a little bit of a different vibe. It's a little more practical. It's titled, “To See Needs and Meet Them.”
“See needs and meet them.” My mom was known for this phrase as I was growing up. All she had to do was say, "See needs . . . " and I knew what she was going to say and (more importantly) what she meant. Today, I find myself repeating that phrase to my children. Whether it's someone needing a tissue because they're crying, a cabinet door that needs to be shut, or toys spread across the floor that need to be cleaned up, my prayer for my children is they will grow up to be people who see needs, and—instead of waiting for someone to ask them—they are the first to stand up and help without ever being asked.
This simple phrase carries so much weight and meaning for me, and hopefully someday it will for my kids as well, teaching them to be observant of their surroundings, to take initiative, to have empathy for others, to be industrious and hardworking, discerning and attentive. Most importantly, it reminds them to live a life like Jesus's example. To have a servant's heart that loves others more than itself. To see the true needs below the surface—the needs of the heart—and to humbly serve in a way that draws the glory and fame to God and his great works rather than to the work of their own hands.
His fame, not ours.
For a heart that is saved is a heart that serves, and a heart that serves is a heart that acts as the hands and feet of Jesus.
Let us be mothers that teach our children to “see needs and meet them.” And not only teach it but live it.
Emily: So good. Tell us more. Tell us where you were at.
Laura: This one, I was definitely in Chicago again. Lots of good writing came out of Chicago. Three under four. I remember my oldest was four years old. I should say that as . . . “three under four.” Yes, that works, right? I was starting to teach this to my oldest son and feeling like, "Okay, we got to get together here. Mama needs some help. Mama can't do it all." It's really true. The entry says that my mom taught me this phrase. I don't know when exactly she started doing this, but she has a lot of little quippy phrases. Honestly, the R|M community probably knows quite a few of them. I've had people like DM them and say, "I hear your mom's voice in my head."
I'm like, "You've never actually heard my mom's voice, but I know what you mean."
Emily: The one I know is “clean left to right.” [Laughter]
Laura: Yes. Here's a tip for everybody. If you're overwhelmed—you're looking at a messy kitchen that's just—a bomb went off in there—start from the left side and move to the right.
Emily: I think about it every day.
Laura: It's so helpful. It just gives you a place to start.
Emily: You're like, "Where do I begin?" Left to right.
Laura: Left to right.
Emily: Okay. Keep going.
Laura: She needs and meet them. I remember her saying this in this happy little voice—her finger was in the air, and it just stuck. As I grew up, I remember that phrase ringing in my own heart and head as I would be at a friend's house, and their mom would be getting ready for dinner, and she's unloading the dishwasher, and I would just jump in and help. That's not credit to like, "Oh, Laura is so great." My mom—she would have had my head if I didn't do these things. I desire, though, for my kids to grow in that because as I’ve become an adult, I've been so grateful for that skill set to have eyes that see needs.
I really think something else that's beautiful is—I think with my own children, I tried to expand that to move beyond just physical needs—to really see someone who needs a friend—who's maybe left out at the playground—or to see if somebody needs a hug. Maybe they just need you to ask, "Are you okay?" I think that that's just training and having the eyes of Christ. This is just training to see as God sees. I love phrases because I do think they really help. I think that the Spirit often brings them to mind in moments where he wants you to do something—where there's an opening to do something.
I hope that this is a helpful phrase for you to take home and employ with your family. You can reframe it to “have eyes to see” or other ways of saying this, but “see needs and meet them.” It's just something that I think, if everybody did it, the world would be a bit of a better place.
Okay, Em, you're up. Last one. Tell us what it is.
Emily: This one is called “When You Can't See God's Help.”
In motherhood, it's easy to see all the things we lack—all the ways we fall short. We heave a heavy sigh and wonder if we'll ever get it right. Hope for ourselves and our children slips from our grasp faster than a bag of fruit snacks after a morning at the park.
So we pray and we ask God for help. We think about how much he loves us and is for us. We remember how strong and powerful, present and capable he is. But . . . then what? We still feel just as weak as we did thirty seconds ago. Has anything changed?
By faith, we can be confident that if we're in Christ, then his Spirit is strengthening us every step of the way. Our hearts might not instantly swell with assurance, and our steps might not immediately bound into a steady pace, but his strength is still there.
Strength in Christ can look like . . .
Moving forward in obedience to God, even though you're tired and you're not sure what the outcome will be.
Having hope in God and his promises, believing that even though things look bleak right now, he is caring for and protecting you.
Turning to the Lord over and over again instead of giving in or giving up and going your own way.
Having a peaceful heart, even when you're struggling or circumstances don't look the way you expected.
Continuing to love others, putting one hand and foot in front of the other out of a desire to serve the Lord and glorify him.
Oftentimes it's hard to see or feel the reality of this type of strength until you turn around and look behind you. When you see that mom from six months ago or two years ago who was struggling and feeling like she wasn't enough, you suddenly realize that God helped her persevere. God provided for her and did a mighty work in and through her, despite your lack. Then you'll breathe a sigh of praise.
Just as faith moves us forward without sight, sometimes it also moves us forward without feeling. But oh, his strength is absolutely there.
Laura: It's interesting that you read this one because literally this morning, Emily, I was coming down the stairs and some thoughts had just been crossing my mind. I stamped my foot on the stair landing. I stamped it. Stomped it? Whatever. I stomped my foot and I was like, "God, you said you would help me in moments where I need you. I don't feel your help right now." I literally temper tantrumed. It's so apropos. I feel like, okay, here's the Lord working that you would read this post. I didn't even know you were going to read this one today, but I feel this because you're talking about—hey, in that moment you might not have a spring in your step, or you might not feel like God is helping, but he is.
Sometimes you only can see it when you look back and give it time. I don't know. This is just very appropriate for me right now with what I even felt this morning of like, "You said you would help." I'm frustrated because I felt like I couldn't change my mind. I couldn't change my heart where it was feeling frustrated about certain things. There wasn't this instant relief. Tell us a little more about the post.
Emily: Yes. I think I wrote this one more recently, and this was in my season of thinking about the topic of weakness and writing He Is Strong. I think a question that kept coming up that moms were asking—which is totally valid—is like you're saying: “What does strength look like in hard situations?” I remember I was sitting in our current home, kids were at school, and I'm there at the kitchen counter with my laptop open. I'm trying to look back on motherhood and see, “What were those moments where I felt really weak in motherhood?” You feel that right in your chest and your stomach. I
It just seems like you're not getting by, and yet, I was looking back on those situations, and I was like, "Oh my goodness. I was absolutely getting by on God's strength. His grace was totally present. There were all these ways he was providing for me. I'm so thankful for those things. I can see it a lot more clearly now." Even looking back and being like, "The fact that I kept going one day after another, the fact that I kept praying, the fact that he had all these believers in our lives that were encouraging us and praying for us, the fact that we were able to still like parent our other children in the midst of struggles with one child who had different disabilities, the way that he caused our other children's faith to persevere in the midst of that"—it was just so many things, and I was like, "Oh, it absolutely was there. I just couldn't see it and feel it at the time."
I just really wanted to capture that—that when we are in a tough situation and we're trying to walk with the Lord and keep doing what is right despite our feelings, it's so mundane. I think it feels like, “Is this even working?” Yet absolutely, the Spirit is the One who is graciously keeping us with God. I forget what theologian said this—it might've been John Piper—but just this idea of “Every day you wake up and you choose Christ is a miracle.”
Laura: I think that's Piper.
Emily: I may be butchering that. It's something to that effect. I just think we take for granted what a work of the Spirit it even is that we're still choosing Christ each day. That might be all. That it's like, “I don't even feel anything. I'm struggling with doubt, or I'm struggling to see how the situation is going to resolve, but God, I choose you.” That is a work of his strength and grace in your life. Hang on, and I think try to look back on times in your life that you can remember. At that moment, I felt like nothing was happening, but I can look back in hindsight and see that it was.
I think those are also—what do they call them? “Ebeneezers.” Or things that you're like, "This is something I can draw confidence from."
Laura: That was our last one. We hope you guys enjoyed and feel a little bit refreshed—a little bit encouraged. Again, if you like these writings and different things like this, we have a whole book of them—all sorts of different types of encouragement. It's sorted topically, so you can even go in and say, "Hey, when I'm feeling angry, when I'm feeling sad, when I'm feeling depressed"—we have entries for almost every feeling that a mom can go through. We hope that this truly is a book that refreshes your spirit. Again, it's called A Million Tiny Moments. It comes out on March 4 of this year, and you can grab it anywhere books are sold.
