3 Questions to Ask Before You Watch
After getting the kids to bed, it’s not uncommon for my husband and I to look at each other and ask: “Is there anything we want to watch?”
During a year when most of us have been at home more than ever before—and our opportunities for other activities have shrunk down to nothing—it’s been an easy choice to turn to the screen.
But how do we choose what to watch? What we let into our hearts through our eyes matters.[1] Some believers will say they have freedom to watch whatever they want; some will say they can’t watch anything. The reality is that all of us must prayerfully determine our own convictions about what we can watch, read, and listen to, and then seek to graciously interact with others when our convictions differ from theirs.
If we want to live rightly before the Lord with our media choices, it will not happen passively. We must move forward with intention and honesty—and with knowledge about what pleases the Lord.
With that in mind, here are three questions to consider when approaching media:
1. Is this something that gratifies my flesh, or is it something that edifies my spirit?
The Scripture is clear: we cannot please the Spirit of God while at the same time indulging our sinful flesh. It’s one or the other: “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do” (Gal. 5:16–17).
This is why we can’t determine what to watch or read by how we feel.[2] What we can do, instead, is turn to Scripture to help us determine whether what we want to watch, read, or listen to is going to feed our flesh or our spirit. Galatians 5:19–23 is a helpful list to use when we think about what to watch. Paul gives examples of “the works of the flesh” such as sexual immorality and idolatry and contrasts those with “the fruit of the Spirit,” such as love, joy, and peace. Considering what we’re going to watch, listen to, or read against this biblical list can help us assess the impact of media on our hearts and minds.
But while we’re called to avoid media that will indulge our flesh, we can also rightfully enjoy media that helps us think about “whatever is true, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, [and] whatever is admirable” (Phil. 4:8). When media is created with excellence and truth, it has the opportunity to reflect the beauty of God—and help us worship him!
Here’s a litmus test I often use when approaching media: Would I feel comfortable watching this movie if Jesus was sitting next to me, in the flesh? If not, then this may be something that is praising sin and worldliness, and I need to reconsider.
2. What is my goal in watching, reading, or listening to this?
God delights when his children enjoy the good pleasures he has given to us. The gift of a delicious meal, fellowship with dear friends, the beauty of an excellent movie, the joy of finishing a treasured book—these are gifts God loves to give his children.
But, as with all pleasures, they can easily be manipulated by our own desires. That’s why we need to attend to our hearts and ask: why are we turning to this media? Do we worry about being left out of cultural conversation if we’re not watching the movies and shows everyone else is watching? Or are we looking to be selfishly pleasured? If so, we need to re-evaluate.
We’re not called to live lives in which we are entertained; we are called to live lives that glorify God. While the two are not mutually exclusive, glorifying God must come first in all things, because we are called to a higher standard—the highest standard—of living like Christ: to “put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness” (Eph. 4:22–24).
Any time we’re contemplating what to watch or read or listen to, we can ask the Holy Spirit to help us honestly answer the question: What is my goal in engaging with this media?
3. Do I trust the Lord to meet all of my needs, or am I looking for them to be filled some other way?
It’s common to want to get our needs met as easily and quickly as possible. So one thing I have to ask myself when approaching media is this: Am I looking for this movie or music to fill some sort of unmet need in my heart—for romance or excitement or joy?
All of our heart needs—for love, for adventure, for joy and purpose and meaning—all of them are ultimately and fully met in Christ. A movie or book might put a small bandage on our hearts for a night, but that ache will only come roaring back when the movie ends or the book is finished. Let us take our longings to Jesus and his Word instead, asking him to fill our hearts with his love and acceptance and purpose: “For he satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things” (Ps. 107:9).
If you feel the need to escape from your current life, take that ache to the Lord in prayer and Scripture study rather than burying it beneath layers of entertainment. Let him unearth what you really need—and you will find him faithful to meet that need.
Navigating the world of media is challenging; if it feels easy, we probably aren’t actually asking ourselves hard enough questions. And while we can’t judge our sisters’ media choices, we should be able to ask each other honest questions about what kind of media we’re digesting and if it’s helping us grow closer to Jesus and look more like him. If it’s not, let’s lovingly confront each other to make the hard and holy choice of purity and Christlikeness. The cost is more than worth it, because our King is completely worthy of our time, hearts, and imaginations. He is worthy of all of our lives.
[1] Matthew 6:22–23
[2] Jeremiah 17:9
