Surviving vs. Beholding
If I’m not careful, I can get through a whole day without really looking at my kids. Sure, I see them running down the hall and throwing blueberries at one another, but I can be so busy and preoccupied with whatever else I’m doing, that I don’t really see them. I don’t enjoy their triumph of climbing the rock wall or notice the deep empathy of one comforting the other. I can approach motherhood with a survival mindset, just trying to make it through another day.
A similar phenomenon happens with God. I can go a whole day, a whole week even, without gazing upon the beauty of Christ, being struck by his majesty or humbled by his power and grace. I can get through another day, doing the things that need to be done but drifting on the surface of a relationship that wants to shake me awake, pull my eyes upward, and command my heart’s attention.
In the Bible, this kind of attention is called beholding: “And behold, it was very good” (Gen. 1:31); “Behold, the kindness and the severity of the Lord” (Rom. 11:22); “Behold, I am making all things new” (Rev. 21:5).
Behold means to look and learn; to pay close attention to; to gaze upon. God has created us to be beholders, but we often find ourselves keeping our heads down just trying to get through. When we’re in the midst of stress and suffering, it might seem like the easiest way to cope is to merely survive until circumstances change. But this bucks against the very fabric of how we’re created. We’re created to be present in our lives and the lives of others especially when it is painful and uncomfortable.[1] Like watchmen waiting for the dawn, we're created to stand at attention, watching for God in every season of our lives.[2] So, we need to learn how to lift our heads and behold, even in the midst of motherhood.
Made to Behold
When our daughters were first born, older mothers kept telling me, “Enjoy every second; it goes so fast.” Though it became so familiar that I barely even registered the advice, after a few months of sleepless nights and spending all day feeding two newborns, this advice started to bother me. Am I truly supposed to enjoy this? All of this? Not every second of motherhood is enjoyable. Not every second of life is enjoyable. Enjoy was the wrong word. What these mothers meant was, “Behold every second with them, it goes so fast.” Pay attention, gaze upon the beauty of your child, watch them closely, this season will turn before you know it.
But even more than beholding our children or the things we love, we are made to behold our God. As the church, we should be like older mothers whispering to one another, “Behold the goodness of the Lord this week. Behold his power and his grace. Behold your risen King who loves you. This day, this week, this year will go quickly. Pay attention to what the Lord wants to show you.” Our God reveals himself to us in many ways—his Word, his creation, his good gifts to us like our children. As we see him and gaze upon him, we grow in our love for him.
Beholding Takes Discipline
When was the last time you were surprised or caught off guard by something beautiful? Awe and wonder strike without warning—the way a sunset lights up the clouds, a perfect fall day, a child exuberantly shouting, “I did it, Mama!” Though awe has an element of surprise in its nature, beholding is something we must cultivate, and learning to behold begins with deciding what’s important.
My husband and I clean the house on Thursdays. As I wipe down counters, do dishes, and vacuum, calls of “Mama, come look” produce an uncomfortable tension in my mind—what is most important right now? I may want to sit down at 6:30 p.m. with a clean home and be done for the week, but right now my daughters want to show me the chalk drawings they made and how fast they can run. I must choose what I will do: vacuum that floor, or turn my gaze upon them and behold the people they are today.
Each day the Creator of the universe wants to catch and hold our attention. He wants to draw our eyes and our hearts to his majesty, his goodness, his mercy, and his grace. All of creation witnesses to the love and greatness of our God. But we must train our ears to hear and our eyes to see glimpses of God’s glory in the midst of our daily lives. We must learn how to put ourselves in a position to behold the everlasting God. This might mean turning on worship music when you feel overwhelmed, opting for time in the Word during naptime, writing down a way that the Lord has worked in your life and thanking him for it, praying a simple prayer repeatedly throughout the day, or doing something that brings you joy and seeking the Lord in prayer as you do it. As we choose to make space for him in our days, we find our vision broadened, our hearing tuned, and our hearts turning toward him more readily and joyfully.
The Lifter of Our Heads
Our God is the lifter of our heads.[3] We don’t have to live these days in survival mode or just keep our heads down. He lifts our heads, he hears our cries, and he sustains us so that we might behold him. Today, allow the Lord to lift your head so that you might behold his glory.
Today, allow the Lord to lift your head so that you might behold his sovereignty and love.
Today, allow the Lord to lift your head so that you might gaze upon the beauty of Jesus.
As we behold the glory of the Lord, our circumstances may not change, but we are transformed.[4] As we gaze upon our Savior, we grow more and more into his likeness and become ones who bear the light of the gospel and the fruits of the Spirit,[5] and we grow in our love for the one whose eye is fixed upon us.[6]
[1] Romans 12:15
[2] Psalm 130:5–6
[3] Psalm 3:3–5
[4] 2 Corinthians 3:18
[5] John 15:5,16
[6] Psalm 33:18
