The Happy Place of Humble Dependence
Ever heard of reaching your limit? As moms, we likely come to that place more times than we can count. When I was a first-time mom, I thought I should be able to do everything on my own: take care of my baby while also doing the dishes, cleaning, cooking, and keeping on top of the laundry pile. I even felt like it was wrong if I wanted to have a break from my child. It felt weak to ask for help. It showed my true state: that I wasn’t Supermom.
We have God designed limitations simply because we are created beings. We have to eat, we have to sleep, we get sick, and all of these experiences point to creaturely dependence. And yet there is something in us as human beings that wants to fight against this dependence, these limitations. Like Adam and Eve in the garden, we want to be like God. We want to do it all, and be it all, to everyone. We want to be strong and capable.
But, it’s good to remember that the Christian faith isn’t for those who are strong and good enough, but for those who are weak and foolish. As Paul explains in 1 Corinthians 1:27–29, “God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are, so that no human being might boast in the presence of God.”
We tend to forget that this portion of Scripture is referring to all of us—to all those called by God in Christ. He is building an army of weaklings to show his strength and power through us.
And God often uses the instrument of motherhood in our lives to humble us, to show us we are weak and foolish, finite and limited. Accepting these truths about our limited creatureliness and God’s infinite power is the key to our rest in Christ as mothers. Jesus said, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matt. 11:23–30).
When we learn the lowliness and humility of Christ, it will bring us rest. Some of our burdens and weariness can be rooted in pride when we think we can be like God in ways that are reserved only for him. Also, many of the burdens we put on ourselves as mothers are ones we don’t have to bear—burdens that are not put on us by the law of God, but through extra man-made laws put on us by the culture in the world and certain expectations in the church. Jesus invites us to cast them off and learn the humility of dependence from him.
When we feel the humbling effects of motherhood, the feelings that we aren’t enough, we can take them to God, who is enough. We can pour out our hearts to him, and trust him as our rock and refuge in the humbling moments of motherhood.[1] Because he has told us, “I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite” (Isa. 57:15).
In this verse, God says that he is close to those who are humble. Or another way to put it is this: our humility brings us closer to God. Greater dependence on him leads to greater intimacy. When we aren’t relying on ourselves, but on the Lord, he draws us in closer as we humbly admit and accept our dependence on him. And he revives us. When motherhood has made us low, we look to him to raise us up, knowing that “he does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength” (Isa. 40:28–29).
But we can’t be raised up in his grace and power until we are humbled. The depths are the way to the heights. This is God’s plan for our motherhood.
Our God lifts up the humble. He will never turn us away when we come to him in need. He welcomes the weak and is a friend to the needy. When he shines his light into our dark places, it’s done not to shame us, but to love us. He’s bringing us back to the happy place of humble dependence on him. The place he intended for us from the beginning, even before sin entered the world.
[1] Psalm 62:6–7
